If time were a universal force which drives even a single atom towards a direction where time flows, exhaustion is a universal law. This law states that all things in this universe eventually runs out.

Yesterday, a friend of mine asked me if I'm happy. I was kindda surprized. It's been a while since a person had asked me such soul shaking question. I don't know exactly why she asked that question or why that question just poped-out of nowhere. I was silent for a second. And then I said yes...I am happy. But there was a part of me that says...I just lied. And the larger part of me says...I dunno. So I went to the chapel to reflect. And I got my answer.

Sometimes, I think I'm ABSOLUTELY happy. And sometimes I think I'm the saddest person in the world. Now I'm just plain confused. I don't know which is which. How can a person be confused of what he's feeling? While in fact he should know himself better than anyone else. At times I realize that there are a lot of things to be happy about. And there are times that I'm just so full of it. But sometimes I just walk into my room and feel like it's so empty that nothing could ever fill it. And then God just whispered to my ear...he said that there's nothing to be confused about. Happiness is simply an exhaustible comodity like fuel. Sometimes you have a full-tank and then eventually you'll run out of it. It doesn't mean that if you were happy once and then feel lonely later at some point, you're just pretending to be happy. Or pretending to be sad. When you feel like you're sad for no reason, you simply ran out of "fuel". It's not because you're having sudden mood-swings or you're simply psycho. You'll just have to find another fuel source and re-fuel yourself. Then you'll be off hopping again.

And then I said...yah...he's right. Perhaps, that's just how God designed the universe. Everything is exhaustible or perishable. It's what keeps people moving.